Luck

I can't talk about why my life is a living hell right now. I would love to tell all of you every gory detail. To post pictures and say, if you see these people, punch them in the face. But, it is work and I am just not that stupid. So, I am going to tell you another story of a bad day that, in hindsight, really doesn't look as bad as this past week has been.

In 2001, I was in a serious car accident. This was the beginning of my back problems and completely not the story I am about to tell. This accident resulted in 3 years of physical therapy and a fairly sizable lawsuit. I was driving north, and a woman pulled out in front of me. I was going 50 mph and the skid marks were less then 4 feet. They said I broadsided her going about 40 - 45 mph.

At the end of all this, I got a settlement check and decided to celebrate. Not the money - trust me, I didn't care about the money - but the fact that it was finally over. No more lawyers, medical bills, insurance adjustors, and guilt for what this poor woman was going through. I felt so bad for that law suit, but there was no other way to get my medical bills paid. I digress...

A friend and I decide to drive to the bank, deposit the check, and then go out and celebrate. So, I am driving down the road and the light in front of me turns yellow. I step on the accelerator slightly, although I would not have had time to stop. And what happens? Yes, you guessed it, a car pulled right in front of me and I broadsided them, with absolutely no time to stop. The difference, I was in a 25 mph zone and there was traffic. I hit him going, maybe, 15 mph. My airbags did not even deploy.

Lucky for me, there was a cop 2 cars behind me. Being the kind of person who babbles incessantly when nervous, the following conversation happened:

Cop: Ma'am, what happened here.

Erratic: OMG. He totally turned in front of me and I totally couldn't stop and this happened to me 3 years ago and I have the check in my purse from the settlement and what the fuck can you believe this happened again because seriously who is this unlucky. Do you want to see the check?

Cop: Um. No. The light was yellow when you went through it. Do you think you could have stopped?

Erratic: Maybe, I don't really know. It would have been a hard break, but, yeah, I probably could have without, like, tires squealing, but it still would have been a pretty short stop and there were people behind me and we were in traffic and I guess I really just don't know.

Cop: Um. OK. I am going to go talk to the other driver.

In the meantime, my friend is like, are you an idiot? You just gave that cop everything he needed to blame you for the accident. Which, I did. I cannot lie under pressure. I get nervous and it is like diarrhea of the mouth.

So, the cop comes back and says that they (there are now, count them, 5 cop cars) have decided to site the other driver. His car is not drivable because I hit his wheel well and bent the crap out of his axle. However, I was free to go. After swapping cars for hers, we headed over to $1 margarita night and proceeded to celebrate/ mourn. We weren't really sure what to do, so we alternately toasted the law suit being over and my poor, poor car.

Also, the bar tender bought me at least 3 drinks because, and I quote, "Nobody is that unlucky."