Beware: Cheesiness Ahead.

Lately, I have been living in some sort of blog dream world. People that I admire, that I read, have been reading this blog. And posting comments. And I know that this is how the blog world works. I know that because I started commenting on blogs as Erratic as opposed to "real me" that eventually they would be curious and read my blog. But, I feel like I just met Kurt Vonnegut. And he's all dead. (Was that too soon? I feel like it might have been too soon.) And I simultaneously fainted and peed and it was the best day ever.

Here is the thing. I love to write. I sit there and write stories in my head on my way to work. I write poetry and short stories constantly on anything that life will let me get my hands on. I am always writing. My brain pretty much functions in two mediums: story and picture. It is how I think. I see the entire world through the lens of a camera (when I choose to look) and my entire life is quantified in how I will tell others about it.

Here is what is weird. I hate talking. I hate being the center of attention. I hate people's focus to be on me. When I started this blog, it was an outlet for me to write. Because sometimes things don't warrant a short story. Or really much of anything. I cannot tell you how many posts I have written that I haven't posted. I kept it private. I slowly started to let a few very close people in to read it. The boy was first. Then Big Jed. Then Krackle. Then Mrs. Williams. Then other friends started slowly trickling in.

But, I kept it private. And I feel like I owe an explanation for that. I don't want the attention. Plain and simple, I don't. But, anonymous me? Anonymous me does. I want to know what people think. But, holy fucking shit, I am terrified to know what people think.

So...the point of this post...I want a review. I really respect these people. Some of my favorite blogs have come from their reviews. They are some of my favorite bloggers. (One of their reviewers has another blog that I have read forever. And she has read and commented on my blog - Hi Gypsy! - and I absolutely fucking love her.) People whose lives have become a part of my own. Because that is what is weird about blogging...you make these friends. These people that you will have in your life forever. But, it is a community. A community I, admittedly, want to be a part of.

AND I AM SO FUCKING BECOMING A PART OF IT. It is the most exhilarating thing that has ever happened to me. Seriously. I am not sure if anything I say is interesting or if I am really any good at this. One day I will grow a pair and submit this blog for a review. Until then, I hope this community continues to embrace me. I hope I will stop posting cheesy things about it. But, mostly, I hope that these people really become a part of my life. I have read about theirs for, at least, a year. Some for many years.

They are all a part of my life. I hope that, eventually, I can become a part of theirs.