Sunday, August 5, 2012

Apparently I am becoming a lesbian

Today was kind  of amazing. My dad and stepmom picked up the boy and I and we went to brunch at this really cool restaurant that sits on the river. The weather was perfect, the atmosphere was gorgeous, and the general manager is a friend so our bill went from $111 to $57. It pays to work in this industry sometimes. Well, it barely pays. But the perks are nice. 

Then we had a lazy afternoon and the boy and I walked to our favorite spot for dinner and beer (they have happy hour from 11 - 7 ALL WEEKEND) and walked through the park and back home. This is why I never blog. I am out DOING things instead of sitting in the suburbs wishing I was out doing things. Honestly. This day never would have happened three months ago. It was the epitome of everything I want from living in the city. 

During dinner, we were discussing our single friends and the following conversation happened:

TB: Last night a friend asked me who I would let you become a lesbian with.

Me: Who you would let me become a lesbian with?

TB:Yeah (totally missing the point of me emphasizing "let")

Me: I cannot wait to hear this.

TB: Well, I originally said Krackle, but her name is the same as your sisters and that weirded me out.

Me: Um. OK? Because this is a very realistic conversation.

TB: So, instead I went with that new girl you picked up on the street and that girl you work with.

Me: The lesbian that I work with?

TB: No. The other girl.

Me: The very straight very married one?

TB: Yes. Well, it's not like this is actually going to happen.

Me: Clearly. Why did you have this conversation again? 

TB: It's just hypothetical. 

Funnily enough, I was aware of that.

On a very lesbian note, Big Jed and I have been texting back and forth about the lack of ample boobs on the beach volleyball team. I sent a text that actually said "fuck those bitches and their itty bitty titties." To which Big Jed responded "cunt rags, all of them." This is why we are friends.

And for the record, it would so be Big Jed or Krackle if I went lesbian. But the other two chicks are pretty hot too.

1 comment:

Ann said...

Psh, I prefer my itty bitties for running because there's no fear of me hitting myself in the face. SO THERE. :P