Monday, September 17, 2012

My go to rage today is spoons and Mordor.


  1. There was quite the political fight today on a friend's facebook status. I was at work, so I came in 66 comments into it! And I read as one side intelligently argued points. Well, one person on that side was throwing shit out that was pulling the Ryan paid for college with Social Security thing, which is valid since his dad died, whatever. Below the belt. Everyone else was rational. And they were arguing with ONE person who was SHOUTY AND YOU ARE WRONG AND OBAMA IS A SOCIALIST AND NOT AN AMERICAN CITIZEN. Dear everyone, ever...even if I was voting for Romney, your argument would have made me argue against you.. Just like I didn't agree with the chick who pulled below the belt shit out about Ryan. Unless you are talking VALID policy choice and showing me FACTS, stop arguing the point. You are a troll. I can watch political ads too. And I don't believe either side. 
  2. I love being busy at work. It makes my day fly by and keeps me moving around and energetic. I do not love being so busy that I work an 11 hour day and forget to eat. I mean, food was ingested. I tried features, grabbed a fry here or there, but definitely did not practice healthy eating habits. So, I came home and ate a cold bratwurst with no condiments, bread, nothing. Just fist and bratwurst. I have never felt more like a kitchen person. Need food. Don't want to cook food. This is food. Eat.
  3. The ONLY reason I watch singing shows is for that one moment when I am completely covered in goosebumps, in the middle of blogging, unable to remember what point 3 was because they just grabbed my attention. Do you know how hard it is to grab my attention? Really, really hard. There is always something shinier.
  4. Speaking of shiny, there is this new guy I hired at work, which makes the entire lunch team under 5'5". We refer to ourselves as the shire. Anyway, I had to tell him FIVE times to finish making cranberry mayo. FIVE TIMES. I finally said, "Look, Frodo, you are driving me crazy. If you don't finish this shit, I am going to throw spoons at you until it is done." To which he responded, "Oh, shit, I forgot to take my ADD meds." And the day improved exponentially. Which made me wonder what I would be like on ADD meds. Wouldn't it be hilarious if I was suddenly capable of solving complex math problems or some shit? I mean, I doubt it. But I have had more than 5 people at work tell me I should consider it. And, yes, my management technique is awesome and professional. I also threaten to send him to Mordor. Without Samwise.
  5. Our house is done. Our house is done. Our house is done. YOU GUYS I AM SO HAPPY OUR HOUSE IS DONE. I am probably going to do another house tour shortly, even though we still have a few things we want to redo. But, we will ALWAYS have a few things we want to redo. So, you may be tortured with this a lot. 
  6. Beer Olympics was this weekend and I am 100% positive that if we have room in our backyard after we landscape, that we are going to be doing this every year until we are too old to do it. Oh, wait, that part already happened as evidence of the Erratic shaped dent in our couch from Sunday. But, it was fun as hell. Which is surprising, because I expected with 20 drunk people in my backyard, there would be a little drama. (OK, there may have been an incident where a guy made out with a different girl than he came with, but the girl didn't seem to care that much and he was really drunk and the girl he made out with was really drunk and it was kind of a non event, but also HILARIOUS because all of these people are well over 30. AND I got to refuse to give him her number. BOOM.)
  7. Obama was less than a mile from my house today. About a mile from my work. It is not very often I will say I AM SO HAPPY I MISSED OUT BECAUSE I WAS AT WORK. But, shit yeah. Every road ever was closed down. If I would have had to deal with that shit, I just picture headline news: "Woman on edge starts throwing spoons at Secret Service and threatening Mordor. Woman has been institutionalized and is currently NOT stable." I get angry when I have to drive. This requires #spoiled. In fact, the number of times I scream "BITCH GET OFF YOUR PHONE" in a day, considering I only drive 2 miles, is ridiculous. And scary. I may have road rage. Also, I will run over every single one of you people on bikes. Not willing to share the road. Don't care if that makes me an ass hole. 
  8. A friend of mine just adopted two brothers and sisters that were on death row in a dog shelter in Kentucky. This will give them five dogs. Big Jed now has four dogs. I absolutely love animals, but you bitches be crazy. I don't think I could do it. Maybe a lot of cats (OH GOD, WHAT DID I JUST SAY?) But, dogs are needy. Now, I will say Big Jed is a much better large number of doggy parent than my other friends, whose animals frequently attack me. No joke. There were marks. But, still. That is a lot of dogs. Like, a lot of dogs.
  9. I am doing some serious blog weeding out. I subscribe to an ungodly amount of blogs. And I find myself going through the 500 new blogs I get a day and really only caring about a handful of them. And then just marking as read to the rest of them. Which then makes me feel guilty that I am not reading them. Which then makes me go read a bunch of shit I don't really care about. About a bunch of people I don't really care about. I very highly doubt that any of you fall into that category (you would have to literally never have commented) but if you are, comment. That personal connection makes me care more and I really do want to connect to more blogs. I just haven't been lately. I read them and enjoy them, but I feel like my time is kind of precious and if you are just going to post lists of ten random things, ahem, that is boring. Yes, I know what I did there. If I know you, though, it is awesome. Right? RIGHT? Maybe not. I am part of the problem. LOVE ME.
  10. My hand, four days post Krav Maga. The other one looks exactly the same. I have class again in three days and today is the first day I can open and close my hands in the morning without some serious massage and groaning. This week I have to work 6 days, two doubles. If you need me Sunday morning, I will be dead. (I realize this is an odd last post, but the blog wouldn't let me put it in the middle of the list? I don't know. I am too tired and hungry to figure it out. Bratwurst = not satisfying.)

2 comments:

Ann said...

If you stop reading my stuff (however sporadic), I will cry.

The end.

J o s e y said...

Ditto what Ann said.

Also, I love your bullet updates, but there is SO DAMN MUCH to comment on that I get overwhelmed and then don't comment on anything. GAH. I am reading and loving though.