Wednesday, July 14, 2010

What's your sign?

Do you ever have days where you are POSITIVE there is a sign on your back? My mom always says she must be growing a separate head because everyone is staring. I have these days often. It's not like I have Pamela Anderson boobs or a mohawk or something. I am pretty plain jane. I don't wear inappropriate things. I dress like Simon Cowell, seriously. That does not stand out in a crowd. Yet I catch people staring at me ALL THE TIME. And with a "that girl has two heads" look on their face.

Anyway, that is not the story I was going to tell, I just got a little ADD up in here. And then said up in here. It's been one of those days.

So, the sign today was "be an asshat to me for no reason" day. Like, seriously. I got cut off, I got shitty comments from fellow students. The boy is in a bad mood from work and somehow angry at me for it? Even the cat! Little, cute, adorable Neil. I got home from walking the dogs and he was standing by the door with his back arched hissing at me. WHAT. THE. FUCK. He hasn't hissed at me since the day we got him. Little bastard.

Oh! OH! And crazy people talk to me. Like, today, this lady was walking her two prissy dogs and I talked to her for TEN MINUTES about how hot it was and how bad the mosquitoes were. Um, lady, they are biting us while we stand here. We might as well jump in a bath of sugar water and get naked here. STOP TALKING. OK, that wasn't really inexplicably angry, more like overly friendly. But, still. I am exhausted by people's inappropriate emotions with me today. Maybe that is just it. I should wear a sign stating my mood and people can deal with me accordingly.

Like, today's sign would read, "More energy than necessary, overly happy, take your dick mood elsewhere."

Then, my every day sign, "I hate people, please give me medication."

Then, when I am in a bad mood, "If you talk to me, you will die a horrible death."

Wouldn't it be nice if we all just wore a sign so you knew what to expect? Because, seriously, I expect the world to cater around my mood. I should also wear that sign.

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